February is traditionally the month of hearts, flowers and cards so sentimental it would make even the most sickening romantic feel slightly nauseous.
But it wasn’t always like that; there was a time when February 14th was just another cold day on the calendar. Exactly who can be held accountable for the birth of St Valentine’s Day isn’t too clear, as the Catholic Church recognises no less than three saints with the name Valentine or Valentinus, according to the History Channel’s Website (www.historychannel.com/exhibits/valentine). They were all martyred.
One story claims Valentine was a priest who performed marriage ceremonies for young Roman soldiers in secret, as the emperor had outlawed marriage for his troops. Of course, his actions were discovered and Valentine was put to death. Another legend on the site claims that he actually sent the first Valentine, to a girl who visited him while he was imprisoned.
Of course, today things have stepped up a notch. No longer is it considered appropriate to turn up on your other half’s doorstep clutching a card in one hand and good intentions in the other. These days, commercialism is the name of the game; gestures should be well thought out and above all, romantic.
Public displays
StValentines.net (www.stvalentines.net) has a number of different things to get you in a warm and fuzzy mood for February. Learn how to say ‘I love you’ in different languages, read how Valentine’s Day is celebrated in other countries and get access to romantic recipes like Valentine’s cookies and pink sorbet. A list of users’ favourite romantic songs can be found on the site, just in case you need a little inspiration.
The Holiday Spot’s romance-inspired Website (www.theholidayspot.com/valentine) allows you to post your message to the object of your affection on their site, so the world can see.
Yet another site dedicated to the sickly sweet holiday is Amore on the Net (www.holidays.net/amore). It looks at the different symbols of Valentine’s Day and how they began, such as Cupid’s association with the holiday and the history of Valentine’s cards.
The site also has horoscopes and Sun Sign profiles, date guides according to star signs and a gift guide. Free e-mail greeting cards for Valentine’s Day can also be found at this site, just in case you can’t make it to a shop in time.
Antidote
Of course, all that sugar and sweetness can leave you with a bit of a bad taste in your mouth. There is, however, the other side of the coin. For every person who adores the ‘Hallmark holiday’, there are probably another two who would like nothing more than to see February 14th revert to nothing more than another February day. If Valentine’s Day stirs up more feelings of bitterness than romance, rest assured you’re not alone. In fact the Web is home to many sites lining up to pour scorn on all things related to the dreaded day.
With Webholidays (www.web-holidays.com/heart), you have a choice: you can delve into the usual hearts and flowers Website dedicated to Valentine’s Day, Be my Valentine; or you can visit Valentine Blues, aimed at those who would rather not celebrate in the traditional style. Read articles, use recipes for one or even use the crafts section to make something called a ‘Bite Me’ t-shirt.
Getting into the spirit of things, Harper Collins is running its very own Anti-Valentine’s campaign (www.harpercollins.com/hc/card/anti.asp). Send your ex an anti-Valentine’s Day card that plays on their most annoying habits, or simply check out the list of recommended reading. Wallow in Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus, or learn how to do something useful with How to Turn Your Ex-Boyfriend into a Toad and Other Spells.
Dave’s Anti-Valentine’s page (http://members.sniffout.net/antivalentine/main.html) is dedicated to the single and the dumped. Very uplifting. He has some dubious advice for those who have the same hatred as he does for Valentine’s Day, plus some quotes and a poll on love. The site radiates bitterness.
Heartless
They hate Bon Jovi lyrics and The Rules, and are sick of women who act helpless to get male attention. Heartless Bitches International (www.heartless-bitches.com) has a bit of a following, and is the perfect antidote to the hearts, flowers and romance in February. It’s definitely not one for the children though, as some of the content can be quite adult.
Heartless Bitches International features a ‘Sappy Site of the Week’, where ‘schmaltzy and insipid’ Websites are named and shamed; the Pukefest, which takes a look at some of the more nauseating comments and experiences that the site’s members have to put up with; and last but not least, Malebag, where the vitriolic and, frankly, graphic emails from male readers are published and laughed at. Well worth checking out.
February 2003
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